Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow And daisies can be a wide variety of colours.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

A young cow died of terminal cancer; he said moo before he died

Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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