Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

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How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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what is 3+3= 8

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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two flowers in a meddow recently bloomed a cow came over and ate them, and the cow died of herpes the next day

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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