What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

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I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Half life 3 confirmed

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Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

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Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

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i love....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................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.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... ME

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What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

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Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Why didn't the girl paint her nails white? Because in this society, that would be considered racist.

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

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"Have you heard the skyscraper joke?" "No." "Oh. Well I don't feel like telling it to you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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