whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

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A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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b

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? a guy who copies antijokes on ant joke.com

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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"Knock knock..." "come in"

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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