Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

Who's on first? Garvey.

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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