Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

taking out the trash... at night

Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

compardre No Pew.. Pew.. At mi OINK.. OINKs...

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

Q: How pregnancy test is performed in Somalia?! A: Shove a piece of bread between the legs of the women and if the bread is bitten when you take it out, she is pregnant!

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...