what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

ewrg

The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

Urban ghettos

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

PENIS :)

Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

There was a little boy (Jewish edition) Saten: Look father, my silk vestments make me look so much more fabulous than you! Gad: Oh! Hawt sweetie! But not as pretty as my dress... Err I mean "silks"... Anyway you are no longer my son! Which means we can do you know what ;) Saten: Hmpf! I am feel disappoint in of your dress! Gad: ITS SILKS! just *basically* a dress... Oh my gawd! You refuse to give it to your "daddy" ;) You are losar ant not gonna get to hang around this club anymore! Saten: OMFG you are so enrage! You are liek not classy or flamboyant at all anymore, sorry pimp "daddy" :/ Imma leavin! And btw Adam my secret lover has such a bigger wienersnitzel anyways, and he is totally eating my fruits if you know what I mean ;) Gad: Oh me so jelez I am completelay going to panish him! I am throwing him out of Paradise and he will only be abley to get children with women now, lulz I am liek so evel. Saten: OMG WEMEN! UR LIEK ZO EVEL! What u goin to do next huh? Forbid Sodomy? Omg tat would be so mean :(... Moral: "NEVER WEAR A FINER SILKS THAN GAD!"...Well, it starts with two flamboyant faggots fighting over who has the "prettiest silk vestments" (basically dresses)... The rest kinda kinda figures.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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