Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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I heard that you could burn punds so I found a fat kid and set him on fire

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what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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what are you mike bibby?

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Poop

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Women's rights.

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Hey whats sad about 4 black people going over a cliff in a cadillac. Nothing

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

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Why was the man crying? He has aids.

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Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops