Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Why is Ellen Degeneres gay? Because she likes the same sex

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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What's the difference between and train carriage and a miscarriage? You can't eat a train carriage!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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knock knock who's there? doorbell repairman

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-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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What's brown and furry on the outside, soft moist and tastes good on the inside, begins with "C" and ends with "T", and has a "U" and an "N" in it? A coconut.

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Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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