I suck at online but have a high gamerscore

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There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

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What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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1)Roses are red... 2)5 black men... 3)dead babies walk into a large crowded bar before dissolving into oblivion at the literary incongruency 4)of the whole situation.... 5)yes chicken got to the other side BEFORE me #)stupid chicken (aka duck rose man help....)

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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What's a group of people that has an N, an I, two Gs, an E and an R that have no souls? Gingers.

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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