A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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