How do u get an A on your test. U lock your teacher in the closet.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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