How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Whats the difference between an aboriginal and a deer? Nothing, infact they are quite similar, they have no house and smell like wild animals and jaywalk.

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

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A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

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Why did the pig cross the road? To chase after his adopted chicken.

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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hers a joke... japanese people

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops