I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

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G

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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