a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow And daisies can be a wide variety of colours.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops