Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

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They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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Yo mama is so ugly that she never got married or involved with anyone in her lifetime because everyone was to scared and ashamed to be around her. you're adopted

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

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Cheese

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

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A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops