Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops