How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

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A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

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what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops