Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Nero, sure you are okay?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops