I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

a chinese man pays the full price

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

Advertiser: Charlies Tax---------- Advertiser: OMG, who are you... Pedobear: Hello kids, come in my taxi(Van) :D

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

Q: Why wasn't the baby playing with his blocks? A: Because his face was stapled to the floor

Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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