What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$$$$bOoBiEs

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whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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Indians

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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I read the terms of service.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops