A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because her husband was abusive and he killed her for not making him a sandwich. They had to take the body the the funeral home so she could have a proper ceremony. Her friends and family mourned her daeth.

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What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

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Women drivers...

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

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Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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were you expecting a joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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Who's Micheal Jackson?

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What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

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why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops