This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

Whats black, white, and red all over? a dead panda.

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

how do you get a blonde one-handed woman out a tree? wave

Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

your momma's so stupid, she starved to death in a supermarket i probably would too...considering all the good shit needs to be cooked

What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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