Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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Together we can get theist likes on anti-jokes :)

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

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whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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