Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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what is the difference of a bag of dead babies and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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Whats the difference between Sarah Palin and Jason Voorhees? Jason has a chainsaw.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

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ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

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Why does Timmy Teblow love penis? Logan Cole made him do it.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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