A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

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Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What do you call a cup that holds liquid A cup

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Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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69

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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What is funnier than 24 69

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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