Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

thumb_up thumb_down -25

An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A dead guy walks into a grave.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

thumb_up thumb_down -25

knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are u crying?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops