Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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Massie is a fatass

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What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

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What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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whats worse than the holocaust? i don't know, the holocaust was pretty bad.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

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whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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