What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens when a gay guy and a hillbilly enter at the same bar togather? a police dog nation gards and a priest had to stop the abomination.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A rapist and a little child walk through a dark forest. The little child says: "It's scary here." Rapist answers: "Tell me about, I gotta go back alone through here."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops