why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

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Roses are Rose, Violets are Violet.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Wats blue and always in the sky?? Cheese! Except cheese is not blue and it is not always in the sky... By Rachael Mcmullan

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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