There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

boobs!

Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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