How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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What's a computer without Internet? A computer.

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they practice.

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What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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What do you call the Flintstones if they were black? N****rs

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what do call a large massacre of 1000000 people? a tragedy

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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