What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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bologna

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

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An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

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what is 3+3= 8

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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