A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So one time there was this woman learning...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A house comes around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

roses are red violets are blue my name is kate boyd im gay

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops