A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

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Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

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What's a good way to kill time? It's impossible to kill an inanimate object.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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Roses are flowers.

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What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

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What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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Which deranged adventurer thinks that (one`s unprotected cranium) is stronger than (a brick structure) Mario. he keeps bashing his head on blocks in attempts to prove his own worth

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He got AIDS and died.

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What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? A BIKE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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