Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What to hear an anti-joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man died.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Click here for free sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops