how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Want to hear a Joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

PICKLES

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -20

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops