I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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