Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

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Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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A man walks into a bar, ouch!

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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Your face is hilarious.

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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