Q: If you're driving down the street in your canoe and the wheels fall of, how many pancakes does it take to shingle your dog's garage? A: 27, because bananas have no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

thumb_up thumb_down -18

RUN

thumb_up thumb_down -18

3 brothers Mohammed, Ahmed and Saahad were on the 09:25 flight from Tehran to New York. They each only carried a rucksack each and a one way ticket. They are Syrian refugees and their parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What made Qtip's so dangerous? Q-tip's music

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo mama so ugly that she often has trouble being attractive towards people of the opposite gender

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops