Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

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What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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There was a cat and a copy cat. the regular cat jumped off a cliff. How many cats are left? 2 Cats have 9 lives!!!

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Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

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A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

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And you honored it I see :P

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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A blind woman was watching tv. think about it

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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