Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey.

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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Q: Why did the irishman walk into the bar A: Because he wanted a drink

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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How do you get the neighborhood hoodlums to stop pushing you over in your wheelchair? Brutally murder their families in front of them.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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Are you gay. No. Ok.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops