What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

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What is is one good thing about global Waming? Nothing.

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If chuck Norris is so awesome how come he's not at my house slamming my face into the keybodhdtegdudgegdtdjaowpqhwvsmx vxbdnsksksh

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What's the difference between a fat person and a whale? The quality of the fat. -Japan

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whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

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I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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