Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

rarw

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

Ebola

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

my egg roll

Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...