- Anti Joke

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

Robin, get in the car, please.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

Q. What's rare, horny, and a myth towards most guys who have never seen one? A. A Unicorn.

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

What did the mentally retarded kid get in his iq test drewl

Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What did the Rabbit say to the horse? They are both completly differebt species and cannot communicate. Therefore, the rabbit said nothing.

A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

Roses are red, violets are blue. You're dog is dead. And so is your family.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

Roses are red Violets are blue Call the cops girl They can't unrape you

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? A long sleeve shirt