Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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What's the difference between a person and a cow? 2% of their DNA. The other 98% is virtually identical.

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What do you call a black priest? a priest, you racist

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What's 2+2? Fish

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How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

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A Fat Kenyan

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why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Ring Ring Hello? Click

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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