What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

What did the Mexican man say to the black man? Hello, how are you today?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

When a Jew with a boner walks into a wall what hits first? It really depends weather his arm or leg is sticking out when he hits the wall. When studying trejectory sciences, you will find out that it will be nearly a 95% chance that his foot will in fact hit the wall first.

One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

When will Abe Vigoda be alive again? Never. There will never again be a time when Abe Vigoda will be alive. For example, Abe Vigoda will be dead for the entirety of the year 2038. He will continue to be dead if we move forward to the year 2091, and even if we keep jumping forward throughout history, stopping in the years 2250, 2871, and 3546, we will not land in an era when Abe Vigoda will be alive. Another way to look at this is to imagine Abe Vigoda had died in earlier years. Let's say he had died in 1902. Would he be alive today? The answer, sadly, is no. We get the same answer if we suppose Abe Vigoda had died in 1822, 1715, or ~ 85,200,000 BPE. To sum up, it is not precisely accurate to say that Abe Vigoda will be dead for a very long time. That implies a limit on the amount of time he will be dead. There is no limit.

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has AIDS.

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

Barack Obama.

So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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