What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

Panda walks into a restaurant with gun ready to eat, shoot and leave to finish a really good grammar joke, but before he can eat, Animal Control tranquilize him and seize his gun. So all he can do is leave unconscious. Meanwhile someone takes enjoyment in slowly burning the dictionary entry for "Panda".

A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

Yo momma's so fat, however, she takes pride in her size because every body is beautiful.

You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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