A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

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What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

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What did Reed read? A. Read?

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How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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A man wanted to kill himself.. He did.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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