how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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