Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

Once, there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end

Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Hey

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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