Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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I'm Polish.

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops