Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

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What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

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Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

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why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

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What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

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A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops